rian johnson after writing glass onion, watching elon musk completely fuck over twitter like a petulant child, knowing his movie is coming out in just a few weeks
Alex Jones is an infamous radio conspiracy theorist who has been a persistent element of American politics for the last 30 years. His radio show, Infowars, uses the tagline “tomorrow’s news today” as Alex claims his information comes from a pantheon of secret sources within the nonexistent shadow government.
Infowars got it’s big break in the early 2000s with 9/11. Alex claims to have predicted the attack beforehand, even though Osama Bin Laden had been all but outright stating his desire to commit a terrorist attack for months if not years beforehand. Alex also claimed that the UN was behind 9/11, claiming that it was done to destabilize the dollar.
Throughout the years, Alex has been a dangerous radicalizing voice in America. He has claimed that every mass tragedy like a terrorist attack or school shooting has been a false flag, generally stating that the tragedy was engineered by the government to strip Americans of their gun rights. Recent court documents reveal that at its peak, Infowars was making 800,000$ profits a day.
He has been sued before, but has generally managed to skirt by on settlements and technicalities.
In 2012, a 20 year old named Adam Lanza shot and killed 26 people in the Sandy Hook Elementary School. Alex claimed that no children died, and that the grieving parents and community members were actually paid actors. He has said equally reprehensible shit in the past, and nothing has come of it. But this time, Alex didn’t stop there. He has been harassing the victims for nearly eight years now, claiming that the parents were agents of the deep state, even going so far as to dox the public addresses of the parents of the victims, and even send “reporters” (read, dangerous armed white supremacists) to their houses. The entire time he was doing this, he was running commercials for his brand of vitamin supplements.
The victims of his harassment are currently suing Alex for defamation. The trial is not going well for Alex. Alex is currently on lawyer 12. Alex’s lawyers have proved themselves to be so incompetent, so unprepared, so blatantly disrespectful to the American legal system, that the judge has handed down what’s called a “default judgement”. Which essentially means “the court has decided that even if you are actually innocent, the court will legally be considering you guilty because of your rampant disrespect for the legal process.” A default judgement was described by one of the lawyers as “approximately as rare as a football game being called on account of unicorns.”
The firm that took the case for the victims side is doing so for free. They have extensively studied Alex and his history, and are currently in the middle of what could be described as a surgical disassembly.
On August 3rd, Alex’s lawyer turned over nearly 2 years of Alex’s phone records. These texts contain DEEPLY incriminating evidence. The victims lawyers asked Alex’s lawyer “hey, we can use these right? Like these are admissible?” And either out of ignorance, incompetence, or potentially even intentionally, Alex’s lawyer said yes.
It doesn’t stop there.
Alex was instrumental to the January 6th coup attempt that happened here recently. One of the victims lawyers was heard on a hot mic saying that they intended to turn the evidence over to law enforcement, heavily implying that Alex may have implicated himself in some nigh-treasonous crime.
- When Goku met Bulma, the first thing she did was shoot him with a handgun - The moon has been destroyed twice - There is a king of the entire planet and he’s a dog - Vampires are real. Werewolves are real. Ghosts are real. Goku is considered a freak for having a tail for some reason - There was an evil mafia rabbit called the carrot master who turned people into carrots. Goku banished him to the moon; it is implied he died the first time the moon was destroyed - At one point yamcha was actually considered a threat - There was a whole arc about the red ribbon army trying to steal the dragon balls; it is revealed that the RR general wanted to use them to become taller - Characters such as Krillin, Tien and Yamcha are actually some of the most powerful humans in the world but literal space gods keep showing up and killing them - Goku’s cloud that he flies has also died twice - Every character ever shown on screen has died at least one time. Except for mr satan - Mr satan is actually a skilled martial artist by real-life standards, but he lives in a world where kung-fu lets you shoot beams - Muten Roshi is (mostly) immortal and will outlive most of the cast - The pilaf gang, one of the earliest villains in dragon ball, are brought back after the distruction of earth, implying that they’re so incompitent at villainy that porunga doesn’t consider them evil - beerus blew up the dinosaurs, then an archaeologist brought them back with the dragon balls - Directly before becoming God, kami-sama was apparently one of the most powerful mortals in the universe at the time - Before joining the good guys, vegeta was basically a space realtor - Piccolo jr is both the son of King Piccolo and his reincarnation - aka he’s slug jesus - Piccolo took over the world once, but since then so many people have tried to blow up earth that no one now recognises him - The fact that krillin doesn’t have a nose is a plot point in the first world marital arts tornumant - Goku can use the kamehameha with his feet - There is an all-powerful god of the universe, and Goku used time travel to clone him - Earth has an absurd amount of powerful beings, and the rest of space is largely lacking in powerful mortals, because most of the powerful extraterrestrials either came to earth and died, or got killed by vegeta - the dragon balls have been used more times during the course of this story than they were in all the years before the story starts, and it’s entirely bulma’s fault for inventing the dragon radar